


A Date to Remember

by Nanenna



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Underfell, Cutesy pet names, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Flirting, Gen, Gift Giving, Gifts, Gratuitous holiday outfit, Grumpy old person, Gyftmas, Gyftmas in July, Holiday get together, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Jape, Jape gone wrong, M/M, Sadly no jolly fatmen show up, Underfell Grillby, alcohol mention, puns, shameless flirting, unless you count lazy older brothers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-06
Updated: 2018-07-06
Packaged: 2019-05-30 09:43:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,194
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15094148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nanenna/pseuds/Nanenna
Summary: Papyrus sees an online ad for a holiday fake date, he decides this would be the perfect jape! The whole family is supposed to gather at his parents' house this year, why not throw in a fun jape while they're at it. But a sudden change in the family's plans throws a wrench into the whole thing. Well, at least some good came of this disaster, who knew his brother and his fake date were so compatible?





	A Date to Remember

**Author's Note:**

> This was going to be part of the Sansby meetcute series, but it focused too much on Papyrus and didn't have enough Sansby interacting. Instead we get this nice little stand alone one shot full of family shenanigans! Based on [this Craigslist ad](http://nanenna.tumblr.com/post/167174249685/orchidbreezefc-its-that-time-of-year) that I always find hilarious. Also I'm weak for UF Grillby/UT Sans I can't explain it I just love it.

Papyrus looked his date up and down, this was his first time meeting him and Papyrus had to admit he was living up to his advertisement. Dark blue-ish purple flames, a pair of expensive looking shades, a shiny black shirt that was only half buttoned showing off quite a lot of chest and a pendant hanging from a gold chain, dark jeans held up by a red leather belt, and shiny black dress shoes. He looked like someone who decided to turn edgy teenage rebellion into a sleek fashion statement.

Papyrus grinned and waved as he bounded up to his date. “GRILLBY! YOU LOOK PERFECT! I CAN’T WAIT UNTIL UNCLE ARIAL MEETS YOU, HE’S GOING TO FLIP HIS LID!”

Grillby looked Papyrus up and down as well. He was wearing a bright red scarf with a white snowflake pattern over a knit green Gyftmas sweater that was cropped to just below his rib cage, a pair of red shorts with green stripes down the side, and a pair of knee high boots complete with what appeared to be knitted boot cuffs. Grillby supposed the outfit would be cute if it wasn’t obnoxiously Gyftmas themed.

Papyrus latched onto Grillby’s arm and dragged him towards a bright red sports car with an open top. As Papyrus opened the door for Grillby he noticed a basket covered in a checkered piece of cloth in the back seat. An actual basket covered in an actual red and white checkered cloth. Once Grillby was seated, Papyrus ran around to the driver’s side of the car and hopped gleefully into the seat before starting it up and heading out.

“OH!” Papyrus exclaimed once they were well on their way. “SOMETHING I FORGOT TO MENTION IN THE EMAILS. I’M LEAVING WHETHER OR NOT YOU START A FIGHT UP TO YOU, BUT IF YOU DO PLEASE MAKE SURE TO TAKE IT OUTSIDE. BUT UNDER ABSOLUTELY NO CIRCUMSTANCES CAN YOU START A FIGHT WITH MY OLDER BROTHER, SANS.”

“… Why? Think I can’t take him?”

“THE OPPOSITE ACTUALLY. IT WOULD BE LIKE PICKING A FIGHT WITH A LAZY TODDLER.”

“… Ah, okay then. No fighting with the lazy toddler older brother.”

“OH, AND MY COUSIN IMPACT JUST HAD A BABY, SO MAYBE DON’T PICK A FIGHT WITH THEM EITHER. DON’T WORRY, I’LL MAKE SURE TO INTRODUCE YOU TO THEM FIRST.” Papyrus paused in thought, then said contemplatively, “AND IT PROBABLY DOESN’T NEED TO BE SAID BUT PLEASE DON’T TRY TO PICK A FIGHT WITH ANY OF THE OLD PEOPLE, ESPECIALLY GRANDPA. YOU KNOW, THE MORE I’M THINKING ABOUT IT THE LESS I’M LIKING THIS WHOLE ‘PICK A FIGHT’ THING. MAYBE… MAYBE THAT WOULD BE TAKING THE JAPE TOO FAR.”

“… That’s fine, it was just an option anyway.” Grillby leaned his jaw on his hand as he stared out the window.

The car slowed as they pulled up alongside a quaint two story house with a pair of sensible sedans in the driveway. “HUH, LOOKS LIKE WE’RE THE FIRST ONES HERE. THAT’S STRANGE… BUT WE ARE ALSO EARLY SO IT’S NOT UNHEARD OF. YOU READY FOR THIS JAPE?”

“… Sure,” Grillby smirked, “it’s gonna be fun.”

“NYEH HEH HEH!” Papyrus reached into the back and picked up the basket before hopping out of the car. Grillby got out on his own and took Papyrus’s hand as they walked up to the front door. Rather than ring the doorbell Papyrus just opened the door and barged on in. “MERRY GYFTMAS EVERYONE!”

“hey paps,” came a soft voice from beyond the entry way.

“PAPYRUS!” A tall skeleton with soft, rounded features walked up and hugged Papyrus.

“HI DAD!” Papyrus just barely managed to shove the basket into Grillby’s hands before throwing himself into the hug. The basket was surprisingly heavy, Grillby wondered what was even inside it.

“SO GOOD TO SEE YOU AGAIN! AND WHO’S THIS?”

“DAD, THIS IS MY DATE: GRILLBY. GRILLBY, THIS IS MY DAD: W. D. GASTER.”

“HELLO, IT’S NICE TO MEET YOU.” Gaster held a hand out to Grillby.

“… Yeah, sure. Same.” Grillby let the older skeleton shake his hand.

“DAD, WHEN ARE THE OTHERS GETTING HERE? I DIDN’T EXPECT TO ARRIVE BEFORE UNCLE ARIAL, YOU KNOW HOW MUCH HE LOVES TO HELP COOK.”

“OH, I SUPPOSE WE FORGOT TO TELL YOU. IT’S JUST US THIS YEAR.”

“WHAT?”

“A last minute change of plans,” a new voice said as another skeleton walked over. This one was a bit shorter than the two Grillby had met so far, with defined features that better matched Papyrus’s than Gaster’s did. “Goodness, what are you all doing just standing in the entryway? Come inside and introduce your date to everyone else.”

“HOW SILLY OF ME!” Papyrus said as he ushered Grillby into the living room. “THIS IS MY PARENT, N. T. ROMAN…”

“A pleasure, I’m sure.” The shorter skeleton shook hands with Grillby.

“MY OLDER BROTHER, C. SANS…”

“yo,” a rather round skeleton waved from where he was slouched into the couch.

“AND THIS IS GRANDPA SEMI.”

“And We’ve Never Heard Of You Before?” Sitting in a corner was a skeleton Grillby hadn’t noticed earlier. He had round features like Gaster and Sans, so round his head looked like an egg. An old, sagging egg. He had cracks over his skull that led to drooping eye sockets, he was wearing a loose, black coat or robe or perhaps a mumu, and resting in his lap were his hands, which had bones missing from them. The old skeleton held up one of his hands in a dismissive wave, but that just made the hole in it all the more apparent.

“EVERYONE, THIS IS GRILLBY.” There was another round of greetings, which felt beyond redundant at this point. “BUT WHAT WAS THIS ABOUT IT JUST BEING US THIS YEAR?” Papyrus asked in confusion.

“I thought Gaster told you about that.” Roman shot Gaster a glare, which caused Gaster to blush and look away.

“MUST HAVE SLIPPED MY MIND,” Gaster mumbled in embarrassment.

Roman sighed, “What am I ever going to do with you? Anyway, everyone decided that since traveling with a newborn is not a smart idea they’re having Gyftmas at Impact’s house this year.”

“OH, I SUPPOSE THAT MAKES SENSE.” Papyrus glanced nervously at Grillby, their masterful jape wouldn’t work with so few people.

“SO TELL US ABOUT YOURSELF,” Gaster said as he guided Grillby and Papyrus to sit on the couch while everyone else took seats around the room. “PAPYRUS NEVER MENTIONED BRINGING ANY GUESTS HOME.”

“THAT’S BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT’D BE A NICE SURPRISE!” Papyrus exclaimed. “WE MET ONLY A COUPLE WEEKS AGO, AND GRILLBY DIDN’T HAVE ANYWHERE TO GO FOR THE HOLIDAYS SO I THOUGHT IT’D BE NICE TO BRING HIM HERE. AS FRIENDS. PLATONIC FRIENDS!”

“awww… no need to be so shy, bro.” Sans was leaning forward, resting his mandible on a hand propped up elbow to knee. “i saw you two holding hands on the way in.”

“… Yeah, Snuggaboo. No need to be so shy,” Grillby smirked as he laced his fingers over Papyrus’s.

“I ALREADY LIKE HIM BETTER THAN THE LAST BOYFRIEND YOU BROUGHT HOME,” Gaster added with a gentle smile.

“yeah, he was a real show stopper.” Sans snickered at his own joke.

“SANS, PLEASE CAN WE GO ONE HOLIDAY WITHOUT YOUR RIDICULOUS PUNS?” Papyrus groaned and rolled his eyes.

“I smell… pie?” Roman straightened up and looked around.

Papyrus looked at Grillby to find the basket he had shoved at him earlier was now in the other’s lap. He quickly picked it up to show off to the rest of the room, “OH YES, I BROUGHT THE PIES JUST LIKE YOU ASKED.” He stood up, Roman quickly followed suit.

“Pies? How many did you bring?”

“WELL I STILL THOUGHT THE WHOLE FAMILY WAS COMING OVER SO I BROUGHT THREE. THEY’RE ALL DIFFERENT FLAVORS TOO, SO WE HAVE PLENTY TO CHOOSE FROM.”

“I suppose we’ll just have plenty of leftovers.” Roman and Papyrus were looking into the basket as they headed out of the room together.

Gaster got up and started to follow them, “I’LL GIVE YOU A HAND IN THE KITCHEN.” He turned to throw a parting word over his shoulder, “DINNER SHOULD BE READY SHORTLY.”

Grillby sat back into the couch, well this prank wasn’t going as planned. Ah well, Grillby was still getting a free meal out of it, he may as well just relax and enjoy himself. If nothing else it was going to be fun to help the family tease Papyrus. He looked to his side, where the older brother seemed to have dozed off, that just left Gramps for conversation.

“… So Gramps, Papyrus’s cousin just had a kid. That makes you a great grandfather now, right? You must feel old.”

“Don’t Be Silly,” grandpa Semi groused. “I’m Not Related To Impact, That’s Roman’s Side Of The Family. The Only Grandkids I Have Are These Two, And They Aren’t Giving Me Great Grandkids Any Time Soon.”

Grillby glanced briefly at the snoozing marshmallow next to him. “… Heh, guess not.”

“oh, i don’t know. you and paps seemed to have hit it off.” Grillby looked down again, surprised to find Sans wide awake and looking up at him with a wide grin. Then again, he had the same wide grin while asleep, or pretending to be asleep. “though i gotta admit,” Sans continued, “you aren’t the kind of guy he normally brings home.”

“He Has The Same Terrible Taste In Men As Gaster.”

“aw grampa, don’t be like that. ren’s great, and dad loves them.” Sans turned to Grillby and gave a wink, “grampa’s just still salty that they eloped.”

A wink? Was this dumpy little boiled potato flirting with him? Well, one of the ‘services’ Grillby had offered was to flirt with family members, and since he was _not_ going to flirt with the funny smelling, old, grumpy pile of bones in the corner or someone old enough to be his parent that just left the couch potato.

“… I hear you have 206 bones in your body, would you like one more?” Grillby made sure to waggle his eyebrows, though since those were made of flames he was fairly certain the maneuver was moot.

Sans just started laughing, “was that a pick up line?”

“… Maybe.” Grillby leaned back into the couch. “… I work at a bar, I tend to collect bad pick up lines.”

“i bet you hear the worst ones.” Sans chuckled some more, “but i know some pretty awful ones myself.”

“… Can’t be any worse than the drunken nonsense I have to hear on a daily basis.”

“wanna bet?”

 

* * *

 

Papyrus was having a less than ideal time in the kitchen with his parents. The pies had been carefully pulled out of the basket and set aside, then the parents resumed preparing the traditional Gyftmas dishes and insisted Papyrus stay to help. Normally he loved to help but…

“I JUST DON’T SEE WHY YOU ARE BEING SO SHY,” Gaster insisted. “HE MAY BE A BIT ROUGH AROUND THE EDGES, BUT HE’S BEEN NICE SO FAR.”

“He isn’t Papyrus’s usual type,” Roman teased while waving a spoon with gravy dripping off the end at them. “Perhaps he feels out of place.”

“DID YOU SEE THE FLASHY WAY HE’S DRESSED? THAT IS DEFINITELY PAPYRUS’S USUAL TYPE.”

Papyrus had to look away in embarrassment, this was not how the day was supposed to go. “I JUST FEEL LIKE MY SURPRISE WAS A LITTLE STALE WITHOUT THE REST OF THE FAMILY HERE.”

Roman sighed, “I wish you had let us know he was coming, he’ll be the only one without a gift.”

“DON’T WORRY ABOUT THAT, I MADE SURE TO BRING SOMETHING FOR HIM TOO. OH! I LEFT THE GIFTS OUT IN THE CAR! I HAD BETTER GO BRING THEM IN.” This was perfect, he could take Grillby out with him and tell him the joke is off but he’s still getting his free meal and please just bear with him until this awful evening was over and everyone could just forget about it! Papyrus picked up the salad he had just finished and went to put it on the dinner table before heading into the living room, Gaster just behind him with his own dish. “GRILLBY, COULD YO-” Papyrus stopped just inside the living room before shrinking back slightly, his eyes sparkling brightly as a hand came up to hide a giggle

Gaster quirked a brow and walked over to Papyrus’s side. He softly asked, “WHAT’S GOING ON?”

“I THINK THEY’RE HITTING IT OFF,” Papyrus whispered back. Sure enough, Sans and Grillby were sitting on the couch, both turned so their bodies were facing each other, rapid firing awful pick up lines at each other while Grandpa Semi dozed in the corner.

Gaster’s brow quirked all the harder, “THEY DO SEEM TO BE GETTING ALONG?”

Papyrus almost started dancing a jig, he never expected something like this! But oh! He couldn’t interrupt now, that would ruin the mood. He did an about face and walked back into the kitchen. Gaster glanced back into the living room before trailing confusedly after Papyrus.

“NEVER MIND ABOUT THE PRESENTS, I CAN GO GET THEM AFTER DINNER. SO, IS EVERYTHING ABOUT READY TO GO OUT ON THE TABLE?”

“Just about,” Roman answered cheerfully. “Gaster keep an eye on the gravy while i check the turkey. Papyrus, could you get another place setting and chair out for Grillby?”

“SURE THING, REN!” Papyrus mock saluted before heading into the dining room to move the place settings and chairs around, as well as get a plate and silverware out for Grillby. Another peek into the living room showed that the pair had moved on from awful pick up lines to equally awful puns. It had been such a long time since Papyrus had seen Sans’s eyes glitter like that. And it was hard to tell since he barely knew the guy, but Grillby seemed to be glowing brighter. This was going to be too perfect!

Back in the kitchen Gaster and Roman seemed to be having a quiet discussion which was cut short when Papyrus came back in. Roman turned to Papyrus and asked, “So… Sans and Grillby seem to have hit it off?”

“YES, THEY’RE TRADING TERRIBLE PUNS RIGHT NOW.” Papyrus grinned enthusiastically at his parents.

“AND YOU’RE NOT BOTHERED BY YOUR BOYFRIEND AND YOUR BROTHER ‘HITTING IT OFF’?” Gaster asked suspiciously.

“OF COURSE NOT,” Papyrus replied less enthusiastically. It seemed he had forgotten a teensy tiny little fatal flaw in his new plan. “WHY WOULDN’T I BE HAPPY FOR MY FAVORITE BROTHER AND MY DATE GETTING ALONG?” Papyrus would need to ‘break up’ with his ‘boyfriend’ and quickly, but there was no way to do that without ruining the mood. Perhaps a quiet ‘break up’ after the holidays? This was going to be very delicate.

“IN THE ABSENCE OF SANS, I FEEL OBLIGATED TO POINT OUT THAT HE IS IN FACT YOUR ONLY BROTHER.” Gaster smiled at Papyrus.

Papyrus’s smile returned full force, “THAT MAKES HIM MY FAVORITE BY DEFAULT THEN. NOW, IS EVERYTHING ELSE READY TO GO?”

“Yes, yes. I Think your father and I can handle this, go tell the others dinner is ready.”

Papyrus happily bounded into the living room. It took a moment for Sans and Grillby to notice him, which only made Papyrus want to squeal in delight. “DINNER IS READY, LET’S ALL GO SIT DOWN.” Before anyone could move, Papyrus tuned and went to rouse Grandpa Semi. “COME ALONG, GRANDPA, LET ME HELP YOU TO THE TABLE.”

“Stuff And Nonsense, I Don’t Need Help.” He clung to Papyrus as he was gently pulled up anyway. Papyrus carefully set Grandpa Semi into his seat while Sans flopped into his own and Grillby sat next to him. Papyrus smirked, things were going great.

“… Oh, is that wine?” Grillby asked.

“It’s a pinot noir,” Roman replied as they started pouring some into the wine glasses in front of each plate.

Papyrus suddenly remembered one of the things Grillby had advertised: a higher than average tolerance for alcohol and the ability to mimic being drunk. “OH GOODNESS, I JUST REMEMBERED I LEFT SOMETHING IN THE TRUNK OF MY CAR. SEVERAL SOMETHINGS, ACTUALLY. GRILLBY, BE A DEAR AND COME HELP ME BRING THEM IN?”

“… Awww, sugar skull…” Papyrus tried not to flinch at the endearment, he was sure Sans had told Grillby about that unfortunate incident, “do you really need me?” Grillby leaned on an arm propped up on the table as he smirked, Sans snickered. Yes, Sans had definitely told him _that_ story.

Papyrus narrowed his eyes at Sans before continuing. “PLEASE, FIREFLY, I REALLY COULD USE THE HELP.”

“… Yeah, whatever.” Grillby stood up and followed Papyrus out.

Once the front door was safely shut behind them, Papyrus started talking. “SO I’M CALLING THE JAPE OFF. IT JUST DOESN’T WORK WITH SO FEW PEOPLE OVER AND UH… NO NEED TO KEEP TRYING TO ACT LIKE A JERK.”

“… Yeah, I had the feeling this wasn’t so funny anymore.”

“YOU GET TO STAY OF COURSE, YOU STILL GET YOUR FREE MEAL AND ALL, IT’S NOT YOUR FAULT MY FAMILY CHANGED THEIR PLANS.” Papyrus had the trunk open and sighed over the sheer amount of gifts inside. He started sorting through them, handing the occasional package over to Grillby.

“… But you still want me to pretend to be your boyfriend?”

“UM… WELL…”

“… Because all you’d have to do is tell them the truth.”

“I DON’T WANT TO ADMIT TO A FAILED JAPE,” Papyrus admitted quietly. “NO, NOT EVEN FAILED, AN ABORTED JAPE. IF I HAD TRIED TO DO SOMETHING AND IT FAILED THAT’S ONE THING, BUT TO ADMIT TO A JAPE THAT NEVER EVEN REALLY GOT STARTED? THAT’S JUST… I KNOW IT’S SILLY OF ME BUT IT JUST…”

Grillby sighed, “… I can understand that logic. These everything?”

“OH, YES! I THINK THAT’S ALL OF THEM.” Papyrus closed the trunk. “THANK YOU FOR UNDERSTANDING.”

Grillby shrugged, “… I get a free meal out of it either way.” The pair returned to the house and dropped the presents under the tree before rejoining the others at the table.

“did you two get that all worked out?” Sans was leaning back in his chair with his hands behind his skull while everyone else was staring at them expectantly.

“They’re Back, So Can We Eat Now?” Grandpa Semi groused.

“YES, WOULDN’T WANT THE FOOD TO GET COLD!” Papyrus said cheerfully as he took his own seat, Grillby not far behind.

The rest of dinner went smoothly, though Sans kept shooting Papyrus strange looks. They were easy enough to ignore with a whole person sitting in between them. Papyrus chose to converse exclusively with Roman, who was sitting on the other side of him from Grillby. Much to Papyrus’s concern, Sans seemed more interested in talking with their dad. When he bothered to talk at all. Grillby was mostly silent. Papyrus was starting to worry by the time everyone had finished.

“So who’s ready for gifts?” Roman asked once the plates were all cleared.

“We Already Opened Presents This Morning,” Grandpa Semi grumped.

“BUT PAPYRUS WASN’T HERE FOR THAT,” Gaster said gently. “SO NOW WE GET TO WATCH HIM OPEN HIS PRESENTS.” Grandpa Semi crossed his arms and looked moodily away.

“AND OF COURSE I BROUGHT PRESENTS FOR EVERYONE TOO. WOULDN’T YOU LIKE TO OPEN YOURS, GRANDPA?”

“Well… If We Must.”

The family, plus Grillby, moved back into the living room. Between Gaster and Papyrus there was soon a gift in each person’s hands and a pile on the floor next to Papyrus’s spot on the couch. “OH, IT DOESN’T SEEM FAIR TO MAKE YOU ALL SIT AND WATCH ME OPEN PRESENTS.”

“nah, bro. we all want to see your face when you open our presents.”

“… What’s this?” Grillby asked as Papyrus dropped a brightly wrapped package into his lap before sitting down next to him.

“I DIDN’T WANT YOU TO FEEL LEFT OUT, OF COURSE!”

“… Well… I… thank you.”

“isn’t paps the best? i bet in no time at all you’ll think he’s the best boyfriend you ever had.” Sans winked at Grillby, Papyrus narrowed his eyes suspiciously at Sans.

Grillby responded to the comment with a shrug. He wasn’t sure what his gift would be, but it was probably something generic and cheap. Papyrus sat back and watched everyone’s faces as they all opened his gifts, giddily watching their reactions. Gaster, Roman, and Grandpa Semi (in his own, grumpy way) all genuinely thanked Papyrus for their thoughtful gifts. Sans held up his “I make science puns but only periodically” coffee mug up and gave Papyrus the biggest grin. Grillby pulled a blood red silk tie from his box and couldn’t help gaping at it.

“DO YOU LIKE IT?” Papyrus asked eagerly.

“… Yes, it’s very nice. Thank you.”

“OH GOOD. I WASN’T SURE ABOUT THE COLOR, BUT I THINK IT SUITS YOU NICELY.” Grillby just nodded. “SO I SUPPOSE IT’S MY TURN. FIRST IS…” Papyrus picked the first gift within his reach up and looked at the tag, “SANS’S GIFT.” He quickly but carefully pulled the sloppily wrapped paper off and opened the box up. He picked up a pair of brightly colored argyle socks to show off to everyone, then a pair of polka dot socks in the same colors. “OH WOW, THANK YOU SANS.”

“there’s three pairs in there, so you can have matching mismatched socks.”

Papyrus picked up the last pair, striped socks in the same color scheme again. “THAT’S GREAT SANS. I GUESS YOU COULD SAY YOU REALLY… SOCKED IT TO ME. NYEH HEH HEH…”

“heh, good one bro.”

When the pun didn’t elicit more than chuckles from the rest of the room, and certainly didn’t start Sans and Grillby off on another pun war, Papyrus was seriously starting to get very worried. Grillby couldn’t have been acting earlier when the pair had been hitting it off, right? If he was genuinely not enjoying himself he’d have said something because he was still trying to act like a bad boyfriend, right? Or was he holding back because he was supposed to be just a regular boyfriend for the rest of the evening?

Papyrus continued to worry about it while opening the rest of his presents. If his reactions and thanks were less enthusiastic than usual no one commented. After he finished opening the last gift and set it aside with the rest, Gaster stood up.

“SO WHO WOULD LIKE PIE?” The room filled with murmurs of affirmation. Once everyone had a slice, everyone started talking again. Sans and Gaster were deep in a conversation about dimensional technology Papyrus didn’t bother trying to follow, Grandpa Semi seemed absorbed by his slice of pie, and Roman was asking Grillby about his life. Papyrus picked at his slice of pie with his fork, the other two had seemed to hit it off so well earlier. What could Papyrus do to bring that back?

“So Sans told me you work at a bar?”

“… I own my own bar, actually.”

“Goodness! That must take some dedication. And how did you two meet? I just realized you never told us.”

“… Oh, well…” Grillby trailed off, unsure what to say at this point.

“WE MET ONLINE,” Papyrus cut in eagerly. “GRILLBY PUT OUT AN AD OFFERING TO BE A FAKE DATE AS A JAPE THAT I THOUGHT WOULD BE FUN TO PULL OFF, BUT WHEN THE REST OF THE FAMILY WASN’T HERE I THOUGHT IT BETTER NOT TO. I ONLY MET HIM IN PERSON FOR THE FIRST TIME WHEN I PICKED HIM UP TODAY.”

“oh, i was wondering when the prank was going to happen.”

“YOU KNEW?” Papyrus asked Sans incredulously.

“well, yeah. you’ve never once made a new friend and not gushed about them to everyone else. it’s totally out of character for you to bring home someone no one’s ever heard of.”

“I SPENT ALL OF DINNER WONDERING WHEN THE JAPE WOULD COME IN,” Gaster said with a chuckle. “IF YOU HADN’T TOLD US WE WOULD HAVE SPENT THE REST OF THE WEEK WONDERING WHAT THE JAPE WAS.” Papyrus blushed at that, but smiled in relief nonetheless.

“So the jape was just bringing a fake date?” Roman asked.

“THINKING ABOUT IT,” Papyrus said hesitantly, “THE FULL JAPE WAS PERHAPS NOT GOING TO BE IN THE BEST TASTE AND I’D RATHER NOT SAY. BESIDES, AT THIS POINT IT’S NOT AS IF IT REALLY MATTERS. HEH.”

“… I was going to talk politics, hit on the cousins, pretend to get sloshed, maybe pick a fight with someone.” Grillby leaned back against the couch with a self satisfied smirk across his face. “All just for a free meal.”

Sans started laughing uncontrollably, “oh man! that would have been a spectacle. aunt verdana and uncle arial would have _hated_ that!”

“That Alone Puts You On My ‘Don’t Hate’ List.” Grandpa Semi was chortling from his chair in the corner.

Papyrus looked as if he wished the earth would open up and swallow him whole. But the way Grillby looked at Sans doubled over in laughter, his flames growing paler gave Papyrus hope. This would be worth it.


End file.
